Letters from Nowhere
by SkySeeker
Summary: When Nina is killed in a car accident, she finds herself in the backwards world of Elsewhere. She meets her dead grandmother, and has a chance to see Sarah again. However, her already backwards life takes a huge twist when she discovers something extraordinary.
1. Prologue: In the End

**A/N: **This story is based off the book "Elsewhere" by Gabrielle Zevin. I do not own it, or else I wouldn't be here sitting on a laptop writing fanfictions. (okay, I probably would be) This chapter is very short, sorry, but the coming chapters will be much longer. Thanks so much for reading this, and any reviews, favorites, and/or follows will make me love you forever ! :D

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**Prologue: In the End**

"The end came quickly, and there wasn't any pain." Sometimes, the boy whispers it to no one. Sometimes, the silence brings him the thought. In the quiet house, nobody hears anything.

For Nina's sake, he wants to believe that the end was quick and painless: a quick end is a good end. But he can't help wondering, how does anyone know? The moment of the crash certainly must have been painful, he reasons. And what if that one moment hadn't been quick at all?

He wanders into Nina's room and takes a cursory glance. A teenage girl's whole life is a collection of odds and ends: a sun-bleached band poster, an unmade bed, a crumpled piece of notebook paper, a pair of heels thrown on the floor in a hurry, a collection of nail polish that has gathered on her bedside desk. In the end, what does it all mean anyway? And what does it matter? Is a person just a pile of junk?

The only thing to do when Fabian feels this way is to hide. Hide in his room and scribble out a love poem. Hide in his bed and blast music, tuning out the world and everything he'd ever cared about. Hide and hide until he can't stand the silence anymore.

Fabian has just gotten settled into a relaxed mood with a hundred-song playlist waiting for him when Amber (the best friend) enters his room and sits down next to him. "Fabes," she says carefully. "You shouldn't do this to yourself. I know it's because of Nina, and you shouldn't pretend otherwise. Even though you were so close to her, there will always be someone out there for you. I'm here. Jerome's here. Even Victor's here."

He forces himself to smile at her joke. Instead of responding, he imagines Nina has just gone away for college. She was nearly eighteen, and their separation was inevitable anyway. The glossy brochures had already begun piling up on both of their desks. Fabian often tried not to think about it, but he always knew time couldn't be stopped. One day they would both go, and that would be that.

"Where do you think she is?" she tries.

Fabian shrugs.

"Do you think she's" - Amber pauses - "up there?"

As far as humankind knows, Fabian thinks to himself, the only thing _up there_ is the moon.

"Well," she continues. "I believe she is up there. And I believe there are angels and puffy clouds and silky pajamas and everything." Amber giggles.

Fabian hesitates for a moment. "I don't know," he confesses. "I'm not sure what's after death. However, I honestly hope that there's nothing. No cotton candy, no nothing. Just pain, and... the end."

"Why?" Amber asks adamantly. "Don't you want to see Nina again?"

"It's just...In the end, the end of a life only matters to friends, family, and other people you used to know." he sighs. "For everyone else, it's just another end."

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Thanks for reading! If you have any suggestions, feedback, or constructive criticism, please feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments! Any favorites, follows, and reviews are greatly appreciated. Thanks again, and have a smagical day XD

-SkySeeker


	2. Chapter 1: At Sea

**A/N: **Thanks to everyone who favorited, followed, and reviewed! I bring you the next chapter of this story. I'm really happy about where this is going :D This is written from Nina's point of view, and probably will be for the rest of the story. I really hope you like this chapter, and it would mean a lot if you left some more reviews ;) By the way, I just published Sherlock fanfiction, so if you could go on my profile and read it, that would be great! Thanks again for reading, and I hope you like it! :D

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Nina Marie Martin wakes in a strange bed in a strange room with a strange feeling that her sheets are trying to smother her.

Nina (who is Nina Marie to her gran, Nina at school, and simply Nins to everyone else) sits up in bed, bumping her head on an unforeseen upper bunk. From above, a voice she does not recognize protests, "Aw damn!"

She peers into the top bunk, where a girl she has never seen before is sleeping, or at least trying to. The sleeping girl, who appears to be near Nina's age, wears a white nightgown and has long red hair flows down her back in a waterfall of copper. To Nina, she looks like a queen.

"Excuse me," Nina asks, "but would you happen to know where we are?"

The girl yawns and rubs the sleep out of her eyes. She glances from Nina to the ceiling to the floor to the window and then back to Nina again. "On a boat," she answers, stifling another yawn.

"What do you mean, 'on a boat'?" Nina asks, perplexed.

"There's water, and lots of it. Just look out the window," she replies before cocooning herself in the blankets. "Of course, you might have thought to do that without waking me."

Nina feels a pang of guilt. "Sorry," she says quietly.

Looking out the porthole that is parallel to her bed, Nina realizes that the sleeping girl was right: hundreds of miles of blue ocean stretches out before them. The sky is tinted with an early-morning darkness that reaches on for as long as she can see. Nina, if she squints, can barely make out a boardwalk blanketed by a layer of fog. There, she sees Amber, waving excitedly. The figures getting smaller by the second, Nina struggles but can see a ghostly outline of who she thinks is Fabian. Finally, she can just see Patricia yelling after her, and Alfie nearly being pushed into the sea by Jerome as he attempts to wave. Ten seconds later, they disappear completely.

Nina gingerly sits back on the bed. Even though she feels remarkably awake, she knows she is dreaming. For instance, there is no earthly way she could have fallen asleep in her bed and woken up on a boat. Secondly, she shouldn't be on a boat when she should be finishing her senior year of high school. If this were a vacation, she would be surrounded by her friends, and people from her school. Her gran was in the hospital, so there was no way she could travel on a boat. Finally, there are things you shouldn't see in real life, such as your friends waving at you from a boardwalk a hundred miles away.

Not wanting to disturb the sleeping girl any further, Nina tiptoes across the room toward the bureau. The telltale sign that she is, indeed, at sea comes from the furniture: it is bolted to the floor. While she does not find the room unpleasant, Nina thinks it feels lonely and sad, as if many people had passed through it but none had decided to stay.

She opens the drawers of the bureau to see if they are empty. They are: not even a Bible. Although she tries very hard to be quiet, she loses her grip on the last drawer and it slams shut. This has the unfortunate effect of waking the sleeping girl again.

"People are sleeping here, you know," she says irritably.

"I'm sorry. I was just checking the drawers. In case you were wondering, they're empty," Nina apologizes, and sits on the lower bunk. "I like your hair, by the way."

The girl runs a finger through her hair, causing the hypothetical waterfall to ripple. "Thank you." Nina notices that she speaks with a light Irish accent.

"What's your name?" Nina asks.

She smiles. "I'm Laurna. You?"

"I'm Nina Martin," Nina returns the smile. "But I'm called Nina."

Laurna giggles, stretching her arms. "You eighteen?"

"In July," Nina says.

"I turned eighteen in January." Laurna looks into Nina's bunk. "Nina," she says, raising an eyebrow. "you mind if I ask a personal question?"

Nina tries not to look surprised. "Um, what is it?"

"The thing is"- Laurna pauses- "well, are you a skinhead or something?"

"A skinhead? Of course not. Why would you think that?"

The girl bites her lip. "Well, um...you don't have hair." She points to Nina's head.

"What?!" Nina jumps from her bunk, hurrying towards the mirror on the other side of the room.

To her horror, her entire head- except for a few of the earliest sprouts of light blonde growth- is hairless. She feels the top of her scalp, and it is oddly smooth. Nina hopes she wakes up from this strange dream soon.

"I- I don't know how this happened," Nina says quietly. "I wasn't like this before."

The redheaded girl furrows her eyebrows. "That's strange," she agrees. "But you're sure you don't know how this happened?"

"Yeah. I have no idea," Nina responds absentmindedly; she is still too busy studying her new reflection. She sees the face of a young woman: round cheeks, a pointed nose. Her eyes, once a bright blue, seem to have been dulled a few shades. Even the skin on her face seems slightly paler than she remembers.

"I wonder if it will grow back," Laurna says. Nina wonders if she'd meant to think this instead of saying it aloud.

For some reason, her question bothers Nina. "Well, it doesn't matter. I'm dreaming,"

"Hmm," Laurna sends her a questioning look through the mirror.

Nina is about to say something, but decides against it. After staring at her shaved head for a few more seconds, she speaks up. "Why don't we see what else is on the boat?"

Laurna shrugs. "Why not? We're both awake now." She climbs down from her top bunk.

"I wonder if there's a hat somewhere in here," says Nina. Even though she's dreaming, she doesn't want to be the strange bald girl. She opens the closet and looks under the bed: both are as empty as the bureau.

"Don't feel too bad about your hair, Nina," Laurna says softly. "But if it makes you feel any better, I've got something I can't explain, too."

Nina raises her eyebrows. "What is it?"

To her surprise, Laurna turns around and lifts her shirt up so her back is exposed. With a pang in her chest, Nina sees a tiny but deep, still-red wound. Even without examining it closely, she can tell it is a serious injury.

"Oh my God," Nina gasps. "How did that happen?"

"No idea." Laurna says, pulling her shirt back down.

"Does it...hurt?" Nina asks carefully.

The freckled girl shakes her head. "Not anymore. It hurt like hell when I woke up, but it's fine now."

"That's good," Nina replies, her eyebrows knit together. She doesn't tell Laurna, but she is worried for her.

She nods. "You know, we should go out now. See what's out there, like you said."

"Alright," Nina agrees.

On the way out, Nina takes a cursory glance at herself at the mirror. Without the shock of expecting to have hair, she notices she is clothed in a white nightgown. "Do you think it matters that we're both wearing pajamas?" she asks.

"It doesn't really matter," Laurna says.

Nina shrugs. "I guess you're right. Besides, what else do you wear while you're dreaming?"

As the pair heads out the door, Nina remembers that somewhere someone once told her never, under any circumstances, to open a door in a dream. Since she can't remember who the person was or why all doors must remain closed, she decides to ignore the advice.

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**A/N:** I hope you liked it! Thanks again for reading :D I would be so happy if you left some feedback in a review or favorited or followed. I'll update as soon as I finish the next chapter, and I hope you have a smagical day! ;3

(Omfg, I just realized when I was writing Laurna's introduction, I forgot to take out the random jumble of letters I wrote when I couldn't think of a name for her. I fixed it, but I'm sorry if that confused any of you! If that happens again, I apologize in advance xD)


	3. Chapter 2: In Memory of Nina Martin

**A/N: **Hey everyone! Sorry for the super late update, but I finally finished the next chapter! Thank you to everyone who favorited, followed and reviewed! It truly means a lot to me that you guys read this. So yeah, the ending is kinda angsty. I feel like I didn't write enough emotion, though D: Oh well, I hope you guys review of what you think of this! Thanks so much for reading, and I'll see you guys later! :D

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**Chapter 2: In Memory of Nina Marie Martin**

Nina and Laurna explore the entire boat, searching in every corner and hallway they see. What they're looking for, Nina isn't sure. She only knows there must be some object reminiscent of her real life. But they find nothing; not even a calendar or a clock. The only thing other than carpets and wallpaper they see is a box of tissues in their cabin.

However, when the pair returns to the room (the number was 10009. Laurna, painstakingly, convinced Nina to memorize it), a small, gentle blue envelope sits on the doormat. The name "Nina Marie Martin" is written in cursive, loopy script.

Knitting her eyebrows together, Nina pauses before speaking. "What's this?" she ponders aloud.

"I dunno," Laurna shrugs. "You should read it. It's obviously for you."

Nina bends down slowly, carefully plucking the envelope from where it lay. "Did you get one of these?"

"No," Laurna says. "Maybe we should check inside."

"Mhm," Nina agrees absentmindedly, studying the small envelope.

Nina opens the door, half expecting to see someone standing inside. Nonetheless, the cabin is how they left it: abandoned. She wonders, what would happen if she saw Rufus, or maybe Senkhara looming inside her dream?

"What's it say?" Laurna asks, startling Nina.

"Um, let me see," she mumbles. Inside the envelope is a small, delicate-looking stationary. She mouths the words written on the card in fancy, formal writing.

_Nina Martin to report to the Observation Deck. Top floor. Please report today, right now._

Laurna peers over Nina's shoulder, reading the card. "Hm. That's strange,"

"Yeah," Nina says, turning over the card. To her expectance, the back of it bears no words. "I wonder what they mean, to report there right _now_. I mean, you can't help but be late."

Laurna shrugs. "I don't know. But you should probably start heading up there. You don't want to keep anyone waiting."

"Who'd be waiting for me? I'm dreaming."

"Well, you probably don't want to risk it." Laurna says, starting on the ladder of the bunk bed. "Meanwhile, I'm going to try to get some sleep. I couldn't exactly find peace and quiet last time I tried."

Knowing any further questioning would just piss off Laurna, Nina decides to go. "Alright. And again, I'm sorry for waking you up this morning."

"Yeah, yeah. Just don't do it again." Laurna yawns.

Nina turns toward the door, but pauses. "Do you think it's at all possible we're two people sharing a dream?" she muses. "And that's why we're here?"

"I dunno..." her bunkmate mumbles, drifting. "Maybe this isn't a dream after all."

"Maybe," Nina says. "Oh well. I'll have time to think about it once I wake up."

From the lack of Laurna's response, Nina turns to the door and strolls out. She realizes that Laurna and her hadn't gone to the very top floor of the ship- or at least, they hadn't realized there was any kind of deck. She wonders what kind of event will be happening at the Observation Deck, and why only she'd been invited.

_Dreams can be strange, _she thinks.

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When Nina finally reaches the top floor, her forehead is coated in a sheen of sweat. She is breathing heavily, and she feels dizzy, but she takes a moment to admire the scenery. All around her is sea: an ocean of dark blue and the sky above her a few shades lighter.

Then she notices the what stands on the deck. In a large semicircle before her are binoculars, the kind she'd see at tourist locations. Nina hadn't used a pair of them in years, and she wonders why now, of all times, they would show up in a dream.

"Excuse me," a female voice with a thick British accent says. "Do you need help?"

Nina turns, surprised by whom she sees. "Victoria Beckham?"

"Yes," she says, appearing slightly frustrated. "I've been shocking people left and right all day. But I noticed you looked a bit stunned. I can explain a few things for you."

"Thanks," Nina says, still stunned. She can't remember the last time she saw Victoria Beckham up close, and thinking about it, she can't recall when she even heard her speak. "You know, my friend would be so excited if this were her dream. She's a big fan."

Victoria tilts her head. "You think this is a dream?"

"Well, yeah," Nina says, grinning. "I mean, how many times do you find yourself on a boat, talking to a celebrity?"

She smiles. "You'd be surprised."

"So what do you want to help me with?" Nina asks, finally recovering from the surprise of seeing a celebrity.

Victoria's smile turns sympathetic. "Well," she hesitates. "I was confused like you, too. But eventually I found out, and it was pretty painful. So I've been waiting here for the past few hours, just helping others figure it out for themselves."

"Figure _what_ out?" Nina begins to feel nervous. She realizes this experience is far too vivid to be a dream.

She rests a hand on Nina's shoulder. "You'll see soon enough."

"How am I supposed to find out?" asks Nina.

"Well," Victoria starts. She motions to the strange binoculars on the deck. "These will help you. You'll need an eternim to make one work, though. Do you have any with you?"

Nina takes a few moments to comprehend what she said. "What's an eternim, exactly?" she questions. "And how are these supposed to help?"

"Do you have your letter with you?" Victoria asks.

Nina, feeling the weight in her pocket, nods.

"Check inside it again. There should be a coin in there."

She does so, and in the corner of the blue envelope there is a strange, foreign coin. She rubs her fingers over the odd texture, and turns it over in her hand. On the back of it, in capital letters, reads "One Eternim- Official Currency of Elsewhere".

"What are these for?" Nina asks.

Victoria leads her to the nearest set of binoculars. Next to each pair, there is an uncomfortable-looking metal stool. Nina sits, and the cool steel sends a chill up her spine.

"See the slot on the side? Put that coin in, and look in them." she instructs.

Nina inserts the coin, but hesitates a few inches away from the binoculars. "What will I see?"

"Hard to say," Victoria says quietly. "I wouldn't be able to tell you."

Instead of further questioning her, Nina simply looks into the binoculars.

What she sees, to her expectance, surprises her. However, as she remembers, not all surprises are good.

Standing in front of a grave is Fabian, holding a bouquet of flowers. Nina can't help but notice they are her favorite kind: lilies.

Fabian carries an expression that, unfortunately, Nina recognizes. He's only looked that way once before, and that was when he thought she was dead.

For several moments Fabian simply stands there, studying the grave. Eventually, he scoffs quietly, as if he can't believe he's there.

"Well, I, um...I never thought that I'd be standing here. I never imagined, not even once, what it'd be like standing over your grave. Especially now. I-I just, I wanted to say goodbye, properly."

Nina stares at the image before her, her pulse quickening.

"It was all so sudden, and it's not fair to either of us," he says. "I miss you like hell. I can't believe you're just...gone."

He takes a step closer to the grave. "I'd always thought we'd grow old together. Never leave each other's side, just like before. I mean, we'd both have to part and separate and die someday. But not like this. I mean, I never even got a chance to say goodbye to you. If I'd known, if I'd have a way to tell you I love you before-"

His voice cracks. Tears fill at the edges of his eyes, and he struggles to blink them back. "It would have been so different if I'd had a chance to say goodbye. To say I'll love you forever, and always. That I won't stop loving you just because you've...crossed over."

Nina's breath became labored. This cannot be happening, she thinks.

"The thing is," he starts, his voice shaking. "I would have died a thousand times to save you. To keep you from leaving. I don't care what the price is, I just want you back." He pauses, reaching out to the headstone. "And...I'm sorry I couldn't save you. I'll never forgive myself for this."

No, no, no, Nina thinks. Please, no.

"You were the greatest person I've ever known, and I sure won't be forgetting everything we've been through. I don't even know how to put into words how much I love you, and miss you. I just...right now, the only thing I can say is that I'm sorry." Fabian closes his eyes.

Fabian, I'm right here. I'm not dead, Nina wants to scream.

"There's just one more thing, just one more miracle, for me," Fabian whispers, bowing his head. "Please, just- don't be...dead."

With that, he stands stiffly, and walks away, leaving the flowers by the grave. Just out of the corner of her eye, Nina can see the name on the headstone. At first, she hopes desperately it's not hers, that it's someone else's, that she's just dreaming and she'll wake up to Fabian holding her in his strong arms. But yet, as she reads the marker, her sprits fall.

_In Loving Memory of Nina Martin_

_July 7th, 1992- July 6th, 2013_

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**A/N: **Excuse my crappy writing style XD So yeah, thanks for reading, and hopefully I can update soon! Thank you to everyone who followed, favorited and reviewed! It would mean so much to me if you left any reviews ;) Well, I'll see you later, and thanks again for reading! :D

-SkySeeker


	4. Chapter 3: Awakening

**A/N**: Hey, everyone! Thanks so much for all your reviews and favorites, it means so much to me :D Anyways, I hope you like this next chapter. Sorry, this is kind of a filler one. I'll try to update more soon ;) I do appreciate your feedback, and it keeps me inspired to write more. So yeah, I'm writing a Supernatural fanfic, and I'll have it posted soon! If any of you are into that, I'd love it if you read it. Well, thanks again for reading this, and I'll see you around! :D

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**Chapter 3: Awakening**

"Wh-What?!" Nina shouts, staring dumbfoundedly at the image before her. _This isn't happening, _she thinks. _This is a nightmare_.

"I'm sorry, I truly am," Victoria says, startling Nina. She'd forgotten there was someone behind her.

Nina pushes away from the binoculars. "Th-this isn't real," she says shakily. "I'm dreaming. I'll wake up soon. I haven't died!"

"I know it's hard at first. But everything will be fine," Victoria promises. "I went through the same thing."

"No. No," Nina shakes her head. "I-I have a life. I'm about to graduate high school! I've been accepted into Harvard, I have a boyfriend!"

Victoria sighs. "It sucks, I know. But you've got to understand that your old life is over now."

"This isn't happening! I'm alive, and I'll wake up and everything will be fine." she says, mostly to herself.

"No, you won't," Victoria says quietly. "I'm sorry, I really am. But please realize, you're not going to wake up from this. What's happening is reality, I'm afraid."

Nina holds her head in her hands, and closes her eyes. "I'm going to wake up!" she shouts. "Wake me up!"

"Please, you've got to understand. You're not dreaming."

"No, no, NO! Fabian! Wake me up! Help!" Nina screams, running to the edge of the boat. She stares over the railing, breathing heavily. Closing her eyes, Nina counts to ten. I'll wake up when I open my eyes, she thinks. Fabian will be next to me, holding me in his arms. I'll wake up from this horrible nightmare.

Victoria walks up to Nina, placing a hand on her shoulder. "It'll be fine, don't worry. Just calm down."

"NO!" she yells, pushing away from the woman's condolences. Without thinking, she sprints away from the deck, down the stairs, away from everything.

Tears run down her cheeks, but she's too distracted to wipe them away. All she can hear is the pounding of her own heartbeat in her ears. She keeps running, trying to escape this terrifying nightmare, until she reaches the cabin.

Nina bursts through the door, gasping as she tries to catch her breath. Ignoring Laurna's questioning glance, she sits down on the bottom bunk and brings her knees up to her chin.

"May I ask what's happened?" Laurna asks after a few moments.

Nina inhales shakily, blinking away the tears from her eyes. "I-I don't know," she lies.

"Nins, even I know that's not the truth," Laurna says, peering into the lower bunk. Her long, flowing red hair nearly brushes the floor.

She wipes her eyes. "My name is Nina," she says hoarsely. "And I don't know what's wrong. Really."

"Well, can you at least tell me what happened?" the ginger inquires, her face is flushed with color.

"First of all, I think you should stop hanging upside down. You'll pass out," Nina says bitterly. "I-I'm still figuring it out. Up on the Observation Deck, there were these binoculars. I looked into one, and I saw Fabi-" her voice cracks at the memory of her boyfriend.

She regains her composure after a few seconds. "I saw my boyfriend. He was standing at a grave with a bunch of flowers, and he said these things. I don't think I've ever seen him so sad."

Laurna, who had finally pulled her head up from the bottom bunk, hops down to the floor and promptly sits down on her knees. "What was he saying?" she asks.

"He was saying he missed me- I mean, whoever he was talking to- and that he wishes they were alive. It almost sounded like he were talking to his girlfriend."

Laurna tilts her head. "I thought you were his girlfriend,"

"Yeah, I am, but I'm not exactly dead."

"Really?" Laurna shifts her gaze to the floor. "This seems awfully lucid to be a dream."

Nina covers her face. "I don't know, okay? But I don't want to be dead. And I don't know how I could've died, anyways."

"You know what happened to me, Nina. Maybe you have something like that, too." Laurna suggests. "I mean, to start, you don't have any hair."

Despite the sudden difference of being bald, Nina has forgotten about it. "I have no idea how that happened, Laurna. Really. I didn't have cancer, or any other disease."

"I heard that when people are in really bad accidents, they shave off your hair and give you a wig for your funeral. Not to be weird or anything."

Nina shakes her head. "That can't be. I was never in an accident,"

Laurna raises an eyebrow. "I think someone wouldn't remember an accident like that," she sighs. "But who knows? Maybe this is just a dream, after all."

"What are you saying?" Nina asks, although she already knows.

The redhead shrugs. "I don't know. I'm just talking nonsense."

"No, I think you're right. I mean, if I wake up from this I'll feel a bit silly, but that doesn't matter." Nina inhales sharply. "I think I'm- well, both of us- I'm starting to think this isn't a dream. That we won't wake up."

So, you're thinking...what, exactly?"

Nina looks down. "I really hope I'm wrong, but...I think we're dead."

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**A/N:** Dun dun dun. XD I'm terrible at doing cliffhangers, but I promise I'll update really soon. Anyways, I really enjoyed all your reviews from the last chapter! I'm sorry it was so feesly lol. I'm not great at doing much else Dx I think the next few chapters might get a bit angsty. So yeah, thanks to everyone who favorited, followed, and reviewed! I'll update as soon as possible, and I love you all ;D

-SkySeeker


	5. Chapter 5: Farewell

**A/N: **Hey everyone! Thanks to everyone who's reviewed so far. I'm sorry for being really lazy with this story, and for my writing style XD I tried to make this one interesting, and a bit mysterious. Agh, when I was writing this chapter, something happened with the Internet and I lost over 890 words of already-written chapter D: Oh well, I guess more time means a better chapter. Well, that's enough babble. I hope you like this next chapter, and I'll see you around! :D

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**Chapter 4: Farewell**

Nina awakes in the morning, her breath caught in her throat. She panics for a few moments, startled by the unfamiliarity of the room, until she remembers where she is. And what she is.

Dead. Gone. Perished.

I_ was killed in a car wreck,_ she reminds herself_. And now I'm in this strange room on a strange boat and I'm never going to see my friends again. _

"You awake?" A voice calls from the top bunk. Laurna's soft Irish voice sets the weight back on Nina's shoulders, forcing any hope of Fabian's comforting voice away.

Nina sighs, pushing the heavy blankes off her. It's considerably warmer in the cabin than it was the day before. "Yeah," she mumbles. "I am now."

"Good," Laurna says. She swings out from the top bunk, landing on her bare feet with a thud. "I think we're to arrive soon."

Surprised, Nina sits up. "What? Arriving where?"

"I have no idea," the redhead scoffs. "But you should see what's outside."

Without hesitating, Nina springs from the mattress and hurries to the circular window. Craning her neck, she can see, in the far distance, a dock emerging from the mist. "How long has that been in sight?"

"It showed up a few minutes ago. I was gonna wake you, but you seemed to have done that fine by yourself."

Nina sighs, furrowing her eyebrows together. "So what do you think is there?"

"'Dunno. But I have this _crazy_ idea it's where people like us go to, well, live." Laurna smiles at her joke.

A knot forms in Nina's stomach. "So you mean something like heaven?"

"I guess," Laurna says passively. "Doesn't look like what they said it would, though."

"So you really think we're, you know, dead?" Nina bites her lip, looking away from the window.

Laurna shrugs. "Well, you were the one who figured it out."

"Yeah, I know," Nina nods. "But don't you think this could be some sort of extremely lucid dream? I mean, who decided that you're on a boat when you die?"

Laurna tilts her head. "Maybe no one decided it," she says. "Maybe we never had a choice."

"Yeah. Maybe," Nina agrees. "Maybe you're right."

Suddenly, the boat comes to a halt. Both Nina and Laurna gasp simultaneously, and Nina peers out the window. "What the hell?"

Laurna's eyes widen, a smile stretching across her face. "I think we're here."

* * *

From the moment the boat stopped, it erupted with life. People of all kinds spilled into the hallways, some confused, some afraid, some completely calm. As they peer around the door, Nina notices most of them are old, so ancient she wouldn't be surprised if they died the next day.

"Should we go?" Laurna asks tentatively. She twists a piece of auburn hair around her finger, and Nina realizes Laurna seems to do this when she is nervous.

"I don't know," Nina says. She glances back into the cabin room, and notices the smaller things for the first time: the faded, light blue paint, the chipped whitewash color on the dresser. She wonders if, after leaving, she will ever see this room again.

Laurna sighs. "Well, I think so. I wouldn't want to be late for anything."

Nina almost asks what in the world they could be late for, but Laurna steps into the hallway, becoming sucked into the flow of the crowd. "See you." She says, before disappearing into the crowd of wrinkled faces and walking canes.

"Um," Nina mumbles, almost joining the crowd to catch up with her, but she decides otherwise. "Don't go."

After hesitating a moment, she enters the cabin room again. The mattress squeaks under Nina's weight as she sits on it. _What would happen if I didn't leave?_ she wonders. _What if I stay here, and the boat returns to wherever it came from? Would I go back? _

_Maybe if I stay, I'll go back to my old life. Maybe if I don't leave, I'll go back with the boat and I won't be dead anymore. I'll go back to Fabian and Amber and Patricia and even Victor. _

Nina's pulse quickens as thoughts of her old life fill her head. _Yes,_ she thinks. _I'll just sit here and wait until the boat leaves the dock, and then I'll get away from this terrible nightmare. I'll wake up to Fabian holding me, telling me everything's okay. _

A smile plays up on Nina's face; she finally has something to hope for. Everything seemed so empty and wistful just yesterday, but she's found a way to get back to her old life.

"I wouldn't linger too long, if I were you."

Nina jumps up from the bed, turning around to see a man standing in the corner of the room. "Who are you?!"

"Don't be alarmed, Nina. I'm only the captain of this ship." He smiles politely. Nina glances at his uniform, which is crisp and neat, and she relaxes slightly.

"How did you get here? Why _are_ you here?" Nina demands, her shock replaced by anger. "And how the hell do you know my name?"

"I'm only here to help you," he says calmly "I'd strongly recommend you get off the boat before it leaves dock."

"Why?" Nina asks adamantly. "What matters anymore? I'm dead, for God's sake!"

The captain's smile fades. "It matters because if you stay here, you'll go back to Earth. However, you won't have a body to return to. You'll turn into a ghost, haunting your friends and family. Eventually, you will be driven insane by the loneliness."

Nina pauses, contemplating the man's words. "How'd you know I was trying to go back?" she finally says.

"You're not the first to try," He takes a step closer to Nina. She inches back, still wary of the man and her situation. "Please, you don't want to do this. What's out there is a better option for you. For everyone who's waiting for you."

"Waiting for me?" Nina asks quietly. "Who could be out there, waiting for me? I'm dead!"

The captain smiles. "I'm afraid you'll have to find out for yourself."

Nina knits her eyebrows together. "Will I ever be here again? I mean, after I leave?"

"I'm afraid not," the man says. "I'm sorry."

She glances toward the now empty hallway. "What's out there?"

"Again, I think it's better if you leave that for your own discovery."

"Alright," Nina sighs, taking a step closer to the doorframe. "Well, thank you. Really, you were a big help. I'm sorry for being so angry earlier."

The man nods. "You're very welcome. I wish you the best of luck."

"See you," Nina smiles, remembering Laurna's final words were exactly the same. She wonders, what is out there? What adventures does this new world hold? And most importantly, will she ever see Fabian and her friends again?

The captain waves. "Goodbye, Nina."

And with that, Nina turns to the door one final time. She draws in a deep breath, and steps into the hallway, heading down a path she has no idea what it will bring.

* * *

**A/N:** OOOOOH CLIFFHANGER! Lol, not really. So in the next chapter you'll finally find out where Nina goes when she dies. And I think the chapter after that is going to finally get angsty and emotional. :D I'm really weird, I love writing feelsy things XD Lol, I was listening to Imagine Dragons as I was writing this. They just get me in a writeish sort of mood xD Well, thanks for reading! I hope you liked this, and I'll update as soon as possible!

-SkySeeker


	6. Chapter 5: Bitterness

**A/N: **I'm so sorry for not updating in forever! I've been really busy with school, and everything has been pretty hectic D: Thanks to all my readers and reviewers! It means a lot to me that you take the time to leave a comment :D Well, here's the next chapter, and I hope you like it! ;)

* * *

Nina Martin grips the railing of the boat, staring intently at the gray floor.

She is going to jump.

The water tens of feet below her swishes loudly, and she notices the boat is oddly silent.

That is, until a voice from behind startles her. "Hello, Nina."

She jumps, swiveling around to face the captain of the boat standing in the doorframe. "What are you doing here?"

The captain smiles slyly, the skin wrinkling around his eyes. "I could ask you the same thing."

Nina studies his face, hesitating before she responds. "I...I don't know. I didn't want to leave."

"I've told you before, the only thing that comes out of staying is a bitter end." The captain's smile fades. "Rather, a bitter forever. You'll be stuck going around in circles for the rest of time."

Nina shakes her head. "Well, I'd much rather stay here than go out-" -she points a thumb in the opposite direction- "there."

"It's actually not that bad out there, you know," the captain said, leaning against the doorframe. "I lived there for a while before I came to work here."

"But you left."

"But I left." He raises his eyebrows.

"So, what made you leave and come here?" Nina juts her chin, gesturing toward the boat.

He shrugs. "No one was here for me. All my friends had gotten pretty young by the time I arrived, and some even had gone back to Earth."

"What do you mean, 'gone back to Earth'?" Nina demands, stepping closer to the man.

He raises his hands in front of him. "You'll find out soon enough, trust me." The captain smiles. "In fact, I think there may be someone waiting for you out there."

Nina stares at him, dumbfounded. "Who the hell could be waiting for me? All of my friends are alive."

"As I said, this world is full of mystery and discoveries."

"You never said that." Nina points out.

He laughs. "Of course. Must have been talking to someone else."

"Do people try to stay often?" Nina asks. She finds herself glancing at the island, and she wonders if she was right to be hesitant.

The captain nods. "More than you'd expect," he eyes her. "But I've never had to catch someone twice before. Most of them take off running when I tell them the consequences."

"Oh," Nina murmurs, chewing on her lower lip. "Sorry about that. Must get annoying after a while."

"Not really," he muses. "It's nice to hear all the different stories and reasons for why they're staying. Kind of a break from all the moping around."

She smiles. "Are there any openings for assistant captain? Sounds like fun."

"Oh, trust me, you won't want to get tangled up with this job." He winked. "There's a lot of people who want to meet you."

"Seriously," Nina laughs. "Who's waiting, exactly?"

The captain tilts his head. "You'll see,"

"Tell me," she nudges his shoulder. "Come on."

"Can't. Sorry." He pretends to zip his mouth. "My lips are sealed."

"What do you mean, you can't?" Nina asks, crossing her arms.

He mocks her gesture, grinning. "I mean, you clearly won't go out there unless you have a reason to. It's obvious something meant a lot to you back there and you want to get back to it."

"Well then, Sherlock Holmes," Nina returns his grin. "Fine. I'll go."

"Really?" He asks, raising his eyebrows. "Or will you just find somewhere else to hide as soon as my back is turned?"

"I'm serious," Nina says. She wonders whether or not she is lying. "I'll get off...as soon as you tell me who's waiting."

"Nope." He shakes his head. "By the way, why were you out here? No offense, but this hiding place isn't exactly ingenious."

Nina looks down, tightening her jaw. "Um...well, I was going to leave. Really. But...I just couldn't, for some reason. So I decided to, I don't know, stay for a while."

"You were going to jump, you mean."

She glances away, avoiding his eyes. "No," Seeing his expression, she shakes her head. "Fine. I didn't really know what I was going to do. But I sure as hell wasn't going down there."

"Listen to me," he says, his expression hardening. "I don't mean to be redundant or whatever, but there's nothing more than this. You _can't_ die here. You're stuck here."

Nina narrows her eyes at the captain. "How would you know this?"

"Because I tried."

She stands there, her arms crossed. "Seriously?"

"Seriously. It's not something do try, and I did anyways. Worst mistake I've ever made."

Nina glances back at the sea. "Alright," she whispers. "I'm sorry."

"Nothing to apologize for," he smiles, and Nina again notices the crinkles around his eyes. "Just make sure not to linger for too long. We're expected to leave soon."

She nods, and curtly smiles. "I'll see you."

"No, you won't." The captain winks, and turns on his heel.

Nina looks back at the island before her. _What have I gotten myself into? _she wonders.

Suddenly, she remembers something. "Wait!" Nina shouts just before the captain disappears down the hallway. "I never got your name."

"Sherlock Holmes!" He calls, without looking back.

Nina feels herself smile, but quickly stops herself. She has something to do.

* * *

"Hello?" Nina asks, her voice wavering.

The dock, which she expected to be completely empty, only held one car. She had, most nervously, walked up to it and spoken out. _What do I have to lose? _she thinks.

Suddenly, a young woman whom Nina does not recognize jumps out the car. "Nina!"

Nina stands there, unsure of what to say.

"Sorry," the woman smiles. "I'm Elaine Harper, your grandmother. I don't think we've had the chance to meet yet."

"But," Nina says. "How can you be my grandmother? You're so young."

Elaine simply laughs. "The years go by fast, don't they? See, here, you get younger and younger the more time you spend here."

"Oh," Nina mutters. Suddenly, a pang in her chest ricochets through her body. "Wait- if I get younger the more time I spend here, I won't see my friends again!"

Elaine's expression hardens. "I'm afraid not," She rests a hand on Nina's shoulder. "I'm so sorry. But I promise you'll find others here."

"I don't care about the others," she retorts bitterly. "I want to see my friends again."

Her grandmother sighs. "I'm sorry. Really. I know it can be hard when you don't know many people here. But I promise, we'll make it work."

"Thank you," Nina says quietly. "Where do you live?"

Elaine smiled warmly, glad to be off the subject. "It's this old place off the coast. It's small, but I'd rather call is cozy." She takes her hand off Nina's shoulder and walks around to the other side of the car. _Why does this seem so much like Earth? _Nina wonders.

"It sounds great," She tries her best to return the smile. "I'm sure I'll be happy there."

"I certainly hope so." Elaine mused, opening the car door.

Nina paused, gripping the handle of the car, feeling the cool metal against her skin. _This is death? _she wonders. She stands there for a moment, the coldness seeping into her pores, before finally letting it go. The chilling sensation on her hand lingers for a moment, before disappearing completely.

The house is small, and sits on a ledge that seems to overlook the sea below it. Why it looks so familiar, Nina does not know. But when she looks closely at it, an eerie sense of deja vu courses through her veins.

"I know it's a bit snug," Elaine calls, making her way to the front door. "But I think we'll make it work."

Nina pauses for a moment before she responds. "Yeah, it'll be fine." She studies the concrete steps as she walks to the front door, her lips pressed together. She tries to distract herself from the weight in her chest, reminding her of Fabian and Amber and all the things she left behind.

She imagines her friends and what family she has left standing in a quiet room, saying silent prayers and replaying memories in their heads. They must be wondering where she is, and whether she is gone, or in whichever afterlife they believe in. She imagines her lifeless body, flowers covering wounds the doctors couldn't stitch up. She thinks of all the things they would tell the crowd, secrets they would announce over her coffin. Surely there would be regrets; things thought in the silence but never said aloud. Until she was dead, at least. But there would be other things, things that couldn't be said aloud. Images of her face lit up with laughter; moments where they knew what she was feeling without anything said or heard.

But there would be other things, things that couldn't be said aloud, only thoughts. Emotions and memories and things that when put together only add up to a lump in their throat. Yet all these...things, while in the end, they just tear you apart, they make everything worthwhile. Why would life exist if it couldn't truly be lived?

Nina feels her eyes sting as she thinks of the life she left behind. After everything, all the lives lost and hearts broken and mysteries solved, she'd just get killed before she could even graduate.

"You coming?" Elaine shouts from inside the house. Nina realizes she's stopped in her tracks, her nails digging into her hands.

"Yeah, sorry." Nina says. "I'll be right there." She brushes away the tears that have escaped her eyes, and walked into the house without looking back.

* * *

**A/N:** Thanks for reading :D Hopefully I won't get lazy with the next chapter and wait until like next year to update XD So, please leave a review! I hope you liked it! :D


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